The process of discovery, healing and integration has seen me hugging a toilet.

In my experience, I oscillate between both positions; hugging a toilet and holding someone's hair.

Actually it was just 3ish weeks back in March when I was having one of those gorgeous exploratory conversations with a beautiful soul when she challenged me enough to shift my perception of what was playing out only to have a really interesting response to the discovery.

A mild panic attack followed by a hugging of the toilet.

The visceral reaction in me took me by surprise - I just had no idea that was in my unconscious - and the discovery of it by my conscious self - well in that moment, It threw me.

When the limiting belief is dug out and brought into the light - it changes expression. In my experience just 3ish weeks back - the need for me to hold back, to not be seen, and to play in a more discreet way felt aligned with who I was and what I needed then.

When the unconscious root was pulled into the light, what showed up next included:

  1. Contacted my mentor and coach to book a 2-hour session to facilitate me and my new found limiting belief asap. I knew he would help me explore this blindspot to the degree that I could heal it, integrate it and become a more whole version of me inside 2hours. Job done.

  2. Within the 48hrs that followed that session, my shannoneastman website went up, Invited To Play (this website finally) went up, and I re-aligned teach a brand to fish website to more authentically reflect the market I am here to serve and the areas I want to play in.

  3. Inspiration emerged from within to sweat every day, eat clean, meditate and self care.

I had done a fair amount of those things already - they were not new - and yet what was new was the new level of flow I found myself in... the new desire to be in meaningful action, the new desire to do the work that matters to grow into the next iteration of me.

So I hold hair back for those hugging the toilet - and I myself hug the toilet.

The never ending spiral shaped ladder is a climb to self-actualisation. I have found that climb only really reveals itself to me, 3 feet at a time - which means I have to keep climbing into the abyss... to continue to see the path emerge before me.

#WorkThatMatters #MoreFlowLessForce It's all fun and games when an unconscious root becomes conscious.

And those unconscious roots - well, they are infinite - the infinite layers of the proverbial onion. Hah.

Namaste kids.

@ShannonEastman <3